What is narcissistic abuse?

 The main component of narcissistic abuse is usually emotional (psychological) abuse but due to a narcissist's lack of empathy, boundaries and accountability other forms of abuse can also become intertwined within it (i.e financial, physical, sexual etc).

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It is on a continuum meaning that the abuse a person suffers could range from relentless put-downs through to dangerous violence.

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Narcissistic abuse can be difficult to detect for many reasons. It may be something you have always lived with and/or maybe after many years you have resigned yourself to it. Unfortunately narcissists are often expert at directing their pain and rage at one person (or a select few people) whilst appearing perfectly normal to the outside world.

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People pay a heavy price for enduring these types of toxic relationships. You may have overwhelming feelings of sadness or be anxious or depressed. It may be hard for you to make decisions. You may struggle to say no to the demands of others leaving yourself exhausted. You may have migraines, chronic fatigue or other health issues. You may feel there is no emotional support from those around you and feel shame at the thought of expressing what you are experiencing.

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It is a complex topic and there is a lot to process. The terminology alone (gaslighting, devaluation, scapegoating, love-bombing etc.) can be mind-boggling.  Here is where therapy can really help. Therapy IS challenging and often longer term for this abuse but ultimately rewarding as it builds your skills and resilience.  Then slowly but surely you can begin to make positive changes towards a life where you are in the driving seat.

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